Strong men make good times, good times make weak men, weak men make bad times and bad times make strong men. It’s a compelling concept that I have been thinking about recently. The world is enjoying such peaceful and abundant times. Yet we seem to be seeing a wave of people becoming misguided in their lives. Inequality is rising. People are living a life defined by technology and within the western world people are feeling lost. So, while it may seem conflicting that we are in good times, we are now in the first stages of bad times. So, can we avoid bad times by becoming strong men?

First a definition. For the purposes of this article a strong man is someone with strong sense of self. They have an idea of who they are and the positive impact they plan to bring the world. So, what is it that helps a strong man be who he is.

Values. Developing your own set of core values is one way in which many men throughout history have built their strength of character. But what are values? Values are defined on google as “a person’s principles or standards of behaviour; one’s judgement of what is important in life.” Values are the internal compass that help to define which decisions to make and direction you take.

Values can provide many benefits, starting with helping to reduce decision fatigue and make tough choices easier. They reduce your likelihood of following the social norms and pressure from friends or parents. They help you define who you are and give you a sense of self.

I know that I was able to make the decision between two jobs a lot easier because my values. My value of growth meant that I knew exactly which one was the better choice.

So how do you find your own core values?

• Start by getting yourself comfortable with a writing device of your choosing. It can be a pen and paper or a laptop or maybe a stone and chisel (if you want permanent values). Make sure that the internet in turned off so you won’t get distracted.

• Ruminate on the things you value most in life. Take the time to think about your life and what you enjoy about it. What times are you most happy? When have you felt proud of yourself? Do some activities make you more fulfilled?

• After you have a spent some time doing this and have a list, you’ll want to refine it down to around 5 values in total. The less you have the better as it allows you to focus on them. If you are struggling you can look to combine values into one that covers both. Or compare them a take the winner of the two until you only have 5.

If you are struggling, I could recommend the values of growth and contribution. These values come from viewing Jordan Shanks video on Doomer Mindset. In the video he explains that growth and contribution are basically the meaning for life. So they are the two values that everyone should adopt into their lives. The reasoning for these two is because you will cover off any other values you might have. Want to feel significant? Grow as a person and in a skill and you will contribute. People will value this and you will feel significant. Want certainty, grow in a skill and contribute. Your skill is valuable and you will get paid, making your life more certain.

The concept can even be found in the life cycle of living things. A tree grows (Growth) and provides fruit and homes to animals (Contribution). The seeds are then spread by these animals which results in more growth.

Now you have your list of values write the final selection on a new piece of paper. Store it somewhere you’ll have access to it often. I put mine in my wallet and try to look at it once a week.

Now go out and grow and contribute.

If you are in still in the need of some inspiration, explore the list below which comes from James Clear.

Core Values List

• Authenticity
• Achievement
• Adventure
• Authority
• Autonomy
• Balance
• Beauty
• Boldness
• Compassion
• Challenge
• Citizenship
• Community
• Competency
• Contribution
• Creativity
• Curiosity
• Determination
• Fairness
• Faith
• Fame
• Friendships
• Fun
• Growth
• Happiness
• Honesty
• Humor
• Influence
• Inner Harmony
• Justice
• Kindness
• Knowledge
• Leadership
• Learning
• Love
• Loyalty
• Meaningful Work
• Openness
• Optimism
• Peace
• Pleasure
• Poise
• Popularity
• Recognition
• Religion
• Reputation
• Respect
• Responsibility
• Security
• Self-Respect
• Service
• Spirituality
• Stability
• Success
• Status
• Trustworthiness
• Wealth
• Wisdom

Notes:

www.artofmanliness.com/articles/30-days-to-a-better-man-day-1-define-your-core-values/

www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newTED_85.htm

www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/8-benefits-identifying-your-values.html

collegeinfogeek.com/how-and-why-to-define-your-values/

jamesclear.com/core-values

goodmenproject.com/ethics-values/25-virtues-found-in-the-best-of-men-fiff/

markmanson.net/personal-values

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mLyAGxovCo

https://markmanson.net/personal-values

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